Apologies for existing!
Apologies for existing, but we do not engage in offensive satire against people living with HIV. You've come to the wrong place. Posted in: #fediblog, #personal
A blog we follow, @futuroprossimo@mastodon.uno, one day asked:
Science will reach milestones unthinkable today,[…] what would you like to see? A world without disease, first alien contact, a green Earth? […]
We would “only” like a world where no one ever has to feel inferior to others and apologize to anyone, simply for existing.
According to certain people across the Internet, a person with a disability and someone living with HIV shouldn't use humor regarding their own conditions. Is it really possible that we still have to justify ourselves for existing and trying to live a “normal” life?
Tired of repeating the same story
For years, everywhere we publish a content, we have always clarified reasons behind our writing project: fighting against HIV stigma through satire, attempting to target those who fuel hatred and discrimination to any degree.
We are inclusive, which means no one is exempt from our mocking: media, institutions, and especially ordinary people who, in the second decade of 2000s, still hold an 1980s mindset regarding HIV and AIDS because they ignore scientific progress and discriminate against people living with HIV within families, relationships, at work, at school, and even in healthcare settings.
We hoped that the advent of COVID-19 and related restrictions on social interactions might foster greater empathy toward those who have been wrongfully “kept at a distance” for forty years. Instead, we are forced to admit that mistrust and suspicion has grown even further in the long term, and people have become even more hostile.
It doesn't take much to understand our reasoning; one simply needs to understand the role of satire from antiquity to the present day: calling out political and societal flaws through humor to make the public reflect, often through a bitter laugh. Satire must target the “powerful” categories, the most privileged, not vulnerable individuals.
Mocking people who are already targets of contempt and stigma is a cowardly act, plain and simple. Furthermore, we clarify that the “powerful” —beyond politicians —, also include circumstances capable of negatively affecting human life, including illness and death; in fact, irony serves to exorcise them.
Between satire and bullying
Unfortunately, for the general public, it is difficult to distinguish between satire and bullying because many web and TV outlets hide behind satire to promote vulgarities like the f-word. It is quite a different matter when that same word is used ironically by a gay man making fun of himself. Are offenses in intentions rather than in words? Let those who live with the condition and have suffered hatred for centuries decide. Freedom of expression does not mean freedom to offend—under any circumstances.
Bullying is extremely easy. Satire, on the other hand, is complex because it requires a shift in perspective: the targets of mockery must be all the self-proclaimed “untouchable” people who indulge in fueling stereotypes from their privileged positions, whatever that may entail.
For our part, we created this blog to exorcise our respective conditions that have been stigmatized since time immemorial.
We are here, we exist!
Elettrona in real life is Elena; she has been blind from birth, is HIV-negative, and is the ex-partner of a man living with HIV (a condition that is public knowledge). Therefore, she has always stood up openly when discussing the infection.
A public condition inevitably brings stigma, even from certain alleged friends; thus, Elettrona developed the ability to respond with witty irony and tell real friends from fake ones.
“Bury them with laughter”? Not quite. Even if one responds with irony, it doesn't mean your words have stopped hurting; it simply means realizing that it's not worth feeling bad over trash like you.
Alessandro “Gifter,” a sighted person living with HIV, made a different choice by disclosing his condition only to those directly around him: his husband, of course, close friends, family, colleagues, and healthcare workers. However, (at the moment) he has no interest in large-scale public activism.
Will he do it? Will he not? Whichever decision he makes on the matter should be respected for what it is.
So do not accuse us of making satire against people who suffer from stigma—if you do, you are stating a falsehood. We were clear on our About Us page, and if you criticize us without going in deep, the problem is not ours.
In fact, let's lay it out clearly: we are convinced that what destabilizes you is the fact that we do not fit the stereotype of a blind person in perpetual self-pity, nor a person living with HIV always remaining silent, nor the frontline activist attending every single rally dedicated to the virus.
Are we harmful performative activists? And why? We are simply trying to contribute to a cause close to our hearts within the limits of our capabilities. Therefore, if anyone wishes to criticize us, feel free to suggest an alternative to what we offer—we would be more than happy to discuss it.
PS: If we respond with a laugh to someone who offends us, it isn't because we got the joke, but because we feel sorry for them and consider them too foolish to realize they are harassing us.
We close with a piece of advice: haters, please get a life and leave us alone.